Our Story

I posted about our day today in a different post. I just wanted to take a few minutes and share our story with you.

Jason and I married in July of 2000. In 2002, we began trying to get pregnant. Months turned into a year and we consulted with our doctor. We tried Clomid with no results. In November of 2003 I had an early miscarriage. Jason and I went through some basic fertility testing only to be given the diagnosis of "undiagnosed infertility." Meaning, the doctors had no idea why we were not getting pregnant.

While we were dating, we talked briefly about adoption being something we may want to pursue. The idea never went away, but was tabled during the time we were trying to get pregnant. We began talking about adoption again near the end of 2003. In mid 2004, we began looking into the different types of adoptions and agencies. Since we were interested in adopting an infant and didn't meet various requirements for international countries, we decided to go domestic. In December 2004, we chose our agency: D.A. Blodgett for Children in Grand Rapids, MI. On February 2, 2005 we submitted our application and began the official adoption process. We were matched with a birth family somewhere between March and May but it fell through. The Friday before Memorial Day, we got THE call. About 7 weeks later, we got the next call, birthmom was on her way to deliver. I was in the delivery room when Hannah Grace was born.

[You should know, before Hannah was born, when we were choosing names, we had picked the name Isaac if we had a boy.]

Hannah really is a doll. We love her with all our hearts. We have an open adoption with her birth family. We see or talk with her birthmom nearly every month. Hannah has a lifebook (a book for a person who was adopted that tells their life story) that she likes to look at and read. In our family, adoption is a positive word that represents a part of what we are about. And we are very proud of it.

Last fall, we started talking about baby number two. We decided to go the same route and turned in our portfolio (picture book for birth families to look through to help them choose an adoptive family) in November.

In February, we got the call that we had been chosen! On March 3, 2007 Moriah Juliet was born. We had Moriah for a little under two weeks when her birthmom decided she wanted to parent. Moriah's picture is on the family picture wall. While she does not live with us, she is still a part of our family. We still pray for her nearly every night. I will never stop praying for her. For her future. It is my responsibility as a parent and my responsibility as a part of the body of Christ. We love her. That's all there is to it!

We were reeling after Moriah left. We're older now, and meet more country's critiera for adopting so we checked it out again. We decided that if we were going to go international, we would go to Liberia. We also talked about foster-adoption (adopting through the foster care system). All the while we had our portfolio back in the domestic infant program with D.A. Blodgett. I really, really, have a heart for birth families and was having a difficult time letting go of the domestic infant process. Losing Moriah was heart-wrenching, but my desire to know my child's birth family trumped my aching heart. I think Jason would've gone international sooner than I, but as you know, that time never came.

Around this time, Jason and I also started a non-profit, Three Voices, an advocacy organization for birth families, adopted persons and adoptive families. We are now working on a website and in the process of choosing board members.

Backtrack a few months ago when Jason and I were up late last night watching TV. The news came on and the newscaster talked about a family in Michigan that had posted their adoption profile on their MySpace account. I turned to Jason, flabergasted. I'd had the same idea! I just never had the guts to do it. I immediately got online and emailed the family I'd heard about on the news. The woman and I emailed a couple times before she emailed me a list of webites she often visited that posted available adoption situations. This is not something I would recommend to someone new to adoption or who has not done considerable research. Even I am still a bit weary.

All of this adoption stuff was weighing very heavily on my mind and heart: not knowing whether we should go international or stay domestic, wanting the kids to be close in age, wanting an African American or bi-racial child. During our church service on Sunday, July 15th, I felt God speak to my heart. I felt Him tell me to let go of my worries and put my focus on Him. That He knew my deepest desires. I need not worry. Look to Him and let go. His voice was very clear. It felt so good.

Last Friday, I decided to check the above mentioned websites. Around 4:50pm I came across a posting for an African American baby boy, born July 15, 2007 in Ohio at 24 weeks gestation. I called the agency and we chatted about the situation and exchanged contact information. Shortly before the end of the call, the social worker mentioned that his birthmom did have one request that wasn't necessarily a dealbreaker, but was important. She had chosen a name for him and wanted it to be some part of his name, if possible. The name she had chosen for her son was Isaac. I surely did not want to assume anything, but I instantly felt a connection. And, of course, you've already read the rest of the story in a previous post.

I wanted to share our story because there are many of you who do not know us personally. It is very clear to Jason and I that God has been leading us from the very beginning. I remember the physical and emotional pain of that miscarriage years ago. I surely didn't know then what I know now. I wouldn't change a single thing. I love that God calls us to the edge of the cliff and then calls us to step off. It's not easy. But He never said it would be. And now, I'm sitting in a hotel room in Canton, Ohio, one baby in the hospital and the other sleeping beside me. I never thought I'd be here, but I'd never want to be anywhere else.

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Do you have questions or comments? We'd love to talk more on our blog about faith, adoption...whatever is on your mind. If you're not comfortable sharing your name, leave it anonymously. We look forward to hearing from you!

Blessings.