Today was a rough day for me. Isaac is fine, I've just been feeling overwhelmed by our circumstances. I'm tired of living like this. Alone. Eating so much crappy pasta. Spaghetti again tonight (not meaning to sound ungrateful). I made it all day without crying until dessert. It was vanilla ice cream with chocolate sauce. I had peanuts in my room from Papa and as soon as I dropped them in the bowl I starting crying. This is my all-time favorite dessert because that's what Papa and I have always had together since I was a little kid. I remember sitting in bed with them at night, eating ice cream with chocolate sauce and peanuts and watching shows like Great American Hero and The Incredible Hulk. So I started crying because I started thinking about all the things we've missed out on. Visits with family and friends, playdates, coffee dates, walks around the block...and I just felt really sad. I still do. And Hannah is doing so well, but this still has to be difficult for her. Jason reminded me that in a few months I'll be complaining that I can't get out of the house. That's true. I still miss everyone like crazy and want to see my dog and cat and walk around the block and see my neighbors.

And my dear, sweet friends who are asking about freezer meals and gift registries, you are so wonderful. I don't even care about that stuff (you know what I mean) I just want to hug all of you.

The really great part about today was when the kids napped at the same time. Not because I had some time to myself (although I did read a Hollywood trash magazine and did a word search so I did enjoy the "me" time) but because my kids and I were together and they were comfortable enough to be sleeping. My two babies napping in the same room for the first time. A memory I'll never forget. Before Hannah fell asleep at naptime, she said a prayer on her own. I'm so glad she's beginning to seek out Jesus on her own. I know she doesn't understand, but I believe she's already building the most important relationship she'll ever have. That makes my heart happy.

I woke up at 3:45 this morning and couldn't go back to sleep. I finally called the hospital to check on Isaac around 4:30. He was fine and I still couldn't sleep. I should've read my Bible or something but instead I took the laptop downstairs and worked on a project I'm trying to finish up before we go home. 7 rolled around and Hannah woke up so my day officially started. I'm probably just tired. I did learn that another friend of mine who I've come to know, here, her nephew (she was taking care of him) died last night. Four families have lost loved ones since we've been here. That's about 1 every month. It's very sad to think that some families don't bring their loved ones home. I'm very thankful Isaac is doing so well and will likely be home within the next couple of weeks. God has truly been answering our prayers. It's impossible to understand why he answers some and not others. I will continue to lift up the families I've come to know, here, in prayer, as I know all of you have been doing for us.

Much love and appreciation.